Saw this on another forum, something we can nearly all relate to  :lol I could add a few more to it and most of us probably could also 
Home mechanics advice sheet
DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat metal bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest and flings your beer across the room, denting the freshly-painted project which you had carefully set in the corner where nothing could get to it.
WIRE WHEEL: Cleans paint off bolts and then throws them somewhere under the workbench with the speed of light. Also removes fingerprints and hard-earned calluses from fingers in about the time it takes you to say, 'Oh sh --'
SKILL SAW: A portable cutting tool used to make studs too short.
PLIERS: Used to round off bolt heads. Sometimes used in the creation of blood-blisters.
BELT SANDER: An electric sanding tool commonly used to convert minor touch-up jobs into major refinishing jobs.
HACKSAW: One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija board principle... It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, and the more you attempt to influence its course, the more dismal your future becomes.
MOLE-GRIPS: Generally used after pliers to completely round off bolt heads. If nothing else is available, they can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.
OXYACETYLENE TORCH: Used almost entirely for lighting on fire various flammable objects in your shop. Also handy for igniting the grease inside the wheel hub out of which you want to remove a bearing race.
TABLE SAW: A large stationary power tool commonly used to launch wood projectiles for testing wall integrity.
HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK: Used for lowering a bike to the ground after you have installed your new brake shoes, trapping the jack handle firmly under the exhaust.
BAND SAW: A large stationary power saw primarily used by most shops to cut good aluminium sheet into smaller pieces that more easily fit into the trash can after you cut on the inside of the line instead of the outside edge.
TWO-TON ENGINE HOIST: A tool for testing the maximum tensile strength of everything you forgot to disconnect.
PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER: Normally used to stab the vacuum seals under lids or for opening old-style paper-and-tin oil cans and splashing oil on your shirt; but can also be used, as the name implies, to strip out Phillips screw heads.
STRAIGHT SCREWDRIVER: A tool for opening paint cans. Sometimes used to convert common slotted screws into non-removable screws and butchering your palms.
PRY BAR: A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip or bracket you needed to remove in order to replace a 50 p part.
HOSE CUTTER: A tool used to make hoses too short.
HAMMER: Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays is used as a kind of divining rod to locate the most expensive parts adjacent the object we are trying to hit.
UTILITY KNIFE: Used to open and slice through the contents of cardboard cartons delivered to your front door; works particularly well on contents such as seats, vinyl records, liquids in plastic bottles, collector magazines, and rubber or plastic parts. Especially useful for slicing work clothes, but only while in use.
SON OF A BITCH TOOL: Any handy tool that you grab and throw across the garage while yelling 'Son of a bitch' at the top of your lungs. It is also, most often, the next tool that you will need  [img alt=Reply With Quote]https://www.biker.ie/forum/images/grey-biker.ie-irishbikerforum/buttons/quote.gif[/img]

Hey guys , Just came across this on evilbay...  Has nybody got one fitted and what are your thoughts?
[size=1.00em]https://rover.ebay.com/rover/0/0/0?mpre=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.ebay.co.uk%2Fulk%2Fitm%2F254017967350[/size]

I have removed the cylinder head and when doing so the cylinder below, which I always call a barrell cylinder, has moved.
If anybody has done a cylinder head job before, have you removed both cylinders and replaced both gaskets?

guys, I had an early FZ1S, sold it for a succession of bikes, got bored of BMW RTs in
May, no bike since.  Had MT-10 in 2017, also. sold before licence went.
Need more fun thinking of another FZ1S. Whaddya reckon, will it still excite? Which should I buy , thinking 2010 onward? Advice appreciated!!

I bid farewell to the forum.
The fazer has been given away to a mate and replaced by a XSR900.


So long and thanks for all the fish!

I have just spent the last 3 months rebuilding a 2004 Fazer 6 that i bought in 2016.  It was in a very bad way and most of the parts were shot.  It's had a total rebuild, with every bearing, Seal and gasket replaced.  Rust was really bad and every part was sand blasted, even the nuts and bolts.  Every alloy part looked like it had been under water for years.  It has cost me way more than the bike is worth, but it's for the wife.  The wife wanted it all painted Purple, but i said it would look crap.  I said to her that less is more and Black and Purple would look better.  Now it is finished, the wife said i was right for once.  So now i have a happy wife for 5 mins lol

merry xmas foccers,  enjoy yourself .       
and the weather looks good so get out on your bikes,

Just picked up a 2008 fz1 and the rear shock is very soft. What other shock will bolt straight on with out any mods. Have seen people using r1, r6 and bmw shocks. Which is the best and easy to fit

Hi All. Roy from Dublin, Ireland,
. Picked up a 2008 fz1 yesterday .
Also have a honda Blackbird

Just a note to thank you all for you fantastic help, a bit of a laugh and advice, this is one of the most active, informative sites I've discovered. I had an itch to scratch and unfortunately the Fazer had to make room for another (ahem) bike, a bigger garage would be nice. The Fazer is a fantastic bike for all round use, anybody with around £1000 to spend on a do all bike would need their head examining for not trying one. Thanks again.

Attached Files

Thumbnail(s)