Many congratulations to evesdad for his talented pictures. His chosen theme for November is:

Quote:"Cool"  however you wish to interpret the word.

Britannia Rescue left me out in the cold last night - literally.

What a bunch of useless shite bags they decided to send out to 'rescue' me, no clue, no morals and couldn't give a fuck about me and the missus.

Basically we decided to go to the old pub we used to go to as our friends were kind enough to come to the area we moved to for a drink a couple of weeks ago.

Rather than pay £15 in a cab each way (bloody trains are off at weekends at the the moment) I took my aging Mondeo and chose not to drink, parked up outside the pub at 21:30 and left at 24:00 when it shut - car wouldn't start, plenty of battery just wouldn't catch and wasn't even trying to fire.

Knowing is was pretty terminal I rang Brit Rescue at 00:30 and was told a roadside assistance vehicle would be sent and the eta was 'hopefully' within the hour. So we waited.

We noticed that it was getting very cold and neither of us was dressed for sitting in a cold car, pub was shut and only the the local drug den late house was open until 1am, no way would we have gone there even if we could get in.

True to word at 01:25 a full 55 minutes later the wagon arrived, engineer gets out, takes a quick look and announces that the car has run out of petrol as the gauge is low, now way says I, it goes much lower than that but he insists and then wastes half an hour driving us to a 24 hour garage to buy a petrol can and 5 litres of fuel, goes back to the car, puts it in and it does the same.

He then gets out his easy start, takes off the air filter cover (after I show him where it is and how to undo the clips) and squirts some down, turn key, car starts and stops,  engineer announces 'it's a fuel problem mate'

I'm thinking 'that's funny I told you that when you pulled up' but said nothing other than 'So you're going to tow us home then?' at which he goes back to his wagon and starts doing something.

By now were are both freezing cold again (warmed up after the trip to the petrol station in the wagon) so we get back in our car and wait, he comes to the window and asks me to sign a sheet of paper, I ask him what it for and he says its to confirm the visit so I say 'Can we deal with this at home we are both freezing cold' and he then tells me 'It will be quicker for me to call the breakdown truck rather than set up the tow bar so I've ordered it'

I ask him to tell me why he can't take me and he says it will be quicker to get the breakdown truck and its on its way now, so I sign the sheet and he says it will be 20 mins and fucks off. By now it is 02:30.

Half an hour later I ring Brit Rescue again and tell then we are in real trouble, we are both stupid cold and where is the truck, had a moan about the engineer leaving us when he could have towed us himself and the guy says he'll call me back.

5 mins later he calls back and says the tow truck the engineer called can't make it so he has ordered another one and it will be there within the hour - this would mean that we had now been in the cold from 00:30 to potentially 04:00 he also tells me that the engineer reported that he couldn't tow us as we have an Estate car with a tow bar fitted so it would scrape the ground on his tow bar, no mention of it being quicker to get the low loader out.

So naturally I go into one and tell him this not acceptable and he needs to get us assistance quickly as we were both suffering from the cold, it really was fucking freezing last night, frost had already started forming everywhere and we had both had to wee down an alley, so not in the best mood.

He keeps saying their policy is within the hour so that's all he can tell me, I point out that if I hadn't rung him I would be sitting there waiting for a tow truck that wasn't coming, he had no answer for that one and assured me that one was on it's way, so we decided to wait, it's now about 03:10

10 minutes later Plod turns up and asks what we are doing, we tell them the story and they help us push the car off the main road (single yellow line) into the pub car park (it was full when we got there) so we are at least safe from harm and parking tickets if it's still there in the morning.

At quarter to 4 I decide enough is enough so I ring Brit Rescue and ask where there truck is, now this is the bit where I finally lost it.

The fucking useless, brain dead fuckwit tells me he's just (fucking right, coincidence or what) had a phone call from the truck driver to say he can't make it and he will have to order another truck which means the 'within the hour' ETA starts again.

After I finished hollering down the phone and the guy was more informed about his legitimacy than he had ever been, I told him to stick his tow truck up his arse where his brains obviously were as no way would we fucking survive another hour in sub zero temperatures and hung up.

We left a note in the car and called a cab.

What a fucking shower of shite Brit Rescue are and what's annoying is that they never used to be, they are now using local cowboy, couldn't give a shit, mouth breathing, teeth sucking, know nothing, money grabbing spanner monkeys and I for one will not be renewing my subscription to them and I am demanding a refund of this year's subs and telling them they are arsehole lucky I'm not suing them for being put at risk by them.

Also when I went to the car today the bastard started without problem, so I took it straight round a garage I know and told them the story and they reckon it is the petrol pump letting go but will run a  few tests to check before replacing it.

So with aching bones all day where I was so cold last night I've pretty much been in a bad mood all day, then I have to nip out and pop into a petrol station to fill up the bike only to be shouted out over the tannoy 'Will the Customer at pump 5 remove their helmet or they won't be served with fuel' I have to say I stomped in there after sticking just a tenner in and asked the smug fatty behind the counter why I had to remove my helmet, the answer was 'its for security sir, we have to see your face'

My reply 'So what if I was wearing a hijab or a burkha then, would you ask me to remove that' the answer was 'I don't make the rules sir' so I go into one a little bit and say its got nothing to do with security, it's just discrimination against bikers as we're all criminals, then stomped off, I'm not proud but I had the hump.

Interestingly enough when I commented about the burkha I got a couple of grunts of agreement from behind me in the queue, no other bikes in the station at the same time so must have been cagers.

Hi all,
Just bought a Fazer. The last one I had was in 2009 and I was registered on FOC-U back then. I'm from North London. Lots of driving experience but those days of wasting time sitting in queues of traffic are history for me hence my plan to use the bike as much as possible. Rebuilding my bike experience as I have actually owned a number of bikes in previous years.
Have hardly looked at this site recently so given time I'll fall into line with your house rules.
Cheers
SteveMc278 

The throttle grip from my keis grips has come loose so need to fix it back in place. In the old days we used hairspray. Does this work still with the newer hairsprays? Or any recommendations for alternatives?

:'(

I had put off changing the plugs on the Mrs car until today as they were a bit tight to get out (rusted!)
Having got them out and the new ones in I stated the car eventually and it is running like shite. Check engine light is on too.

Fec. Should have paid Ford to do it in the first place I think.

Here goes,i saw a advert for a cb1 1990 for £1000 or swap for 125. I have a YBR 125 2009 with 14k on the clock (the cb has 30k on).I have been told the cb is in very very good condition,my ybr is in good condition i know i could get £1100 for mine,but do you guys think it is a fair deal my ybr for his cb1. Since i can,t afford to buy a new bike at the moment a swap is the only option and it,s not often you see that so what do you guys think.

no techie section so i gotta post / im not getting pms have i done summat wrong?

After 9 1/2 years I think it's time to change my battery - anyone got a good recommendation?


I was looking at AGM for £48, have heard Yuasa is meant to be good and although mine has managed
to last this long, I usually have to jump start a few times in winter, which is not fun.

hi all, anyone got a hugger for fzs 600 2003, black or blue, let me know.  cheers