Down the pub - the thread about nothing and everything

[mtread]

:lol

[fazersharp]

with the recent farce about the drone and police saying there may not of even been one and then saying there are 64 sightings.I heard someone describe it as Schrodinger's drone  :lol

[fazersharp]

Last week bbc news had a feature about Fat Cat bosses 2 mins later someone realised and changed the title  :lol 



EDIT --There was a picture here once but it seems to of vanished.
I will have to explain.
There was a spokeswoman on talking about pay and she was FAT and the strap line under said  Fat Cat bosses, I thought it was funny and took a picture and then a couple of mins later the strap line was changed to "bosses pay" I think someone in the control room must of spotted it too

[tommyardin]

My question would have to be what percentage of the population were literate in 1611? So did translating it really change peoples understanding of the scriptures or did most still rely on biased readings during church services?

Really - I think your question should read - what percentage are literate in 2017?  People are like sheep - and will follow accordingly

And I would like to see your wife tits.  :rollin :rollin :rollin

Again

[Grahamm]

Anyone know how to cancel an eBay bid?

I offered £5 on a cowboy outfit and I'm 5 minutes away from owning the Tory Party...

[steve 10562cc]

You do get the Labour party, SNP, DUP, throw in for free BARGIN 

[mtread]

With UKIP you get £10 back  :lol

[darrsi]

On the way to work this morning, riding on the right side of 2 lanes, and as i went over a blind bridge i was suddenly distracted by a row of neatly lined up yellow bikes, which all looked rather smart i thought.


After i was about to go past them i noticed this lunatic with his arm stretched out in the road as i glanced to my left, then saw him drop his hand so thought nothing of it......until i saw the line of bike coppers all standing behind him.


Wonder if he wanted me to stop?  :b


S’pose i’ll never know now?  :rollin :rollin :rollin

[Grahamm]

A woman phones her mother in law and says "Can you tell me, if a child poops itself, who should change it, the mother or the father?"

"It's always the mother, dear" comes the reply.

"Ok, in which case can you come over here because your son has got drunk and sh*t himself!"

[mtread]

.

[Grahamm]

I just bought myself a pair of shoes with memory foam insoles.

No more forgetting why I walked into the kitchen!

[celticdog]

If quizzes are quizzical what are tests?

[YamFazFan]

If quizzes are quizzical what are tests?

A load of B******S :lol

[Grahamm]

When my wife left, I was sad, upset and lonely.


Since then I have got a dog, bought a motorbike, shagged two hookers and spent nearly a grand on booze and drugs.


She'll go fucking mental when she gets back from work...

[Grahamm]

"What's the problem, Constable? Releasing birds at a wedding is romantic."

"You released ostriches, Sir..."

[Dudeofrude]

https://www.instagram.com/p/BzqM3GNlVFu/...de4clp6jk6

Not sure if this link will work... hes a fucking idiot but it did tickle me

[Grahamm]

I wasn't sure where to put this, but...

I'm stuck on a crossword clue, I was wondering if anyone could help?

The clue is simply "Postbox"

[Dynspud]

I am NOT going to ask the obvious question  :lol :lol :lol


.....oh, go on then.......how many letters??

[DILLIGAFF]

Why is the manager of the England WOMEN'S football team a man ?Surely one for the sexual equality team???

[Grahamm]

I am NOT going to ask the obvious question  :lol :lol :lol


.....oh, go on then.......how many letters??

Lots, it's a post box!

(At this point I'll admit that I got caught by it yesterday...  :o )