What do people usually say?

[Robbie8666]

I live in Cornwall & work near Basingstoke (with digs in Portsmouth... long story...)

when people find out I live in Cornwall they ask how long that takes to travel & when I tell them 4 hours they then ask if I do it every day?
when I say I got digs in Portsmouth they say.. thats a long journey!!! lol (its only 35 miles!)

[lew600fazer]

I spent my working life in the Merchant Navy.

When I got home on leave friends would always say

When did you get back, it was usually the first question.

When do you go back, was always their second one

Where did you get to

Saudi Arabia, , there was always someones wife/girlfriend would say how lovely.  :rolleyes

[risticuss]

When people ask what I do for a living, I say, "I'm a pattern-maker", to which they always reply, "What, dresses and suits and that sort of thing?"
I've had someone once say, "You must be good at knitting then..."

[Robbie8666]

i remember as a kid been asked what i wanted to be and my reply was ...

a saggers maker bottom knocker!!
didn't get many replies to that!!  :lol :lol

[YamFazFan]

I couldn't be arsed with that, yamfazman, no patience...

:lol.good 1!

[Razgruff]

when asked what I do
I reply  "I dig holes".

subject moves on, nobody seems interested in holes  :\

[Farjo]

Not even a "Well , well, well?"

[richfzs]

By all that's holy, frazer, is that the best you could do? :rollin

[Farjo]

Yes And I don't see you coming up with anything better mash

[alan sherman]

Cycle.  Do you wear a helmet?

Who gives a shit whether I do or don't.  Really?

[stevierst]

When I was in the Army and home on leave and I saw friends/family, one of the first things they say is "when are you going back?" Charming!

Standing there in my leathers, wearing my helmet whilst paying for petrol, and the only bike on the courtyard. cashier looks across at the pumps and asks "which one is yours?"

And these people are allowed to be out on their own......;D

[Farjo]

Cycle.  Do you wear a helmet?

Who gives a shit whether I do or don't.  Really?

Apparently some people shout out of cars "Where's your helmet?" At cyclists. Have you ever  had that?

[Looney tune]

When I say ' Gamekeeper ' I get, cruel bastid, murderer etc. If I give it another angle and say Wildlife management I get , interesting, great job etc. One day people will see we don't walk about all day with a shotgun and dog at our side.

[locksmith]

When I give em the bill

HOW MUCH ?

:lol

[Kosmic Kartman]

When I go for a curry and ask for a chicken Phall  :lol

"Oh Sir dat is velly velly hot curry Sir"

Er Yes... That's why I ordered it.

[BIG MAC]

'Will you shut the feck up about independence' seems fairly common these days

[Oldgit]

in the west of Scotland shop assistants always say "Is that you" there way of asking if you have finished ordering or such.----Crazy

[bigralphie]

When i tell people I am a technical manager for an electronics retailer

Oh you into computers and gadgets then.....No Im into motorbikes
Oh I thought you would have to be.....No I know a lot about them but I,m into motorbikes  :lol

[darrsi]

when asked what I do
I reply  "I dig holes".

subject moves on, nobody seems interested in holes  :\

What sort of depth are we talking about?
I met a Channel Tunnel worker years ago.......

[pete786.u]

I met a mate of mine one day and he asked if I was still working nightshift and when I said yes his Mrs` said "Oh that must be good as you have all day to do what you want" to which my mate replied "You stupid foccin woman, when do you think he sleeps" She still didn`t get it.