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It Is Essential To...
#1
kneel on an uncapped tube of Autosol in the garage.
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#2
lose the 10mm spanner and socket at the same time
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#3
Take the keys out of the seat lock after removing the seat so you don't damage them, then throw the keys into the underseat void (for safe keeping) whilst you are working on the bike...... Guess what happens next?
Owner of Motorcycle Republic, Specialist in unfucking things that others have fucked up.
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#4
Forget to turn on the fuel tap after working on bike with tank off and go for a ride later......................without a 6mm hex-key
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#5
Attempt to bleed brakes without removing rubber seal on reservoir cap. Order a new tyre to fix a slow puncture before checking for a loose valve.
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#6
Always forget where you put down that one tool you had in your hands only 5 seconds ago...
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#7
(10-06-14, 08:52 AM)Dead Eye link Wrote: Always forget where you put down that one tool you had in your hands only 5 seconds ago...


To then discover it's right in front of you - can't see the wood for the trees or something like that
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#8
Something under the seat of my XJR1300 got in the way of the cable release, the seat wouldn't come off. I lifted a corner and waggled a long screwdriver around only to puncture a can of emergency repair tyre weld.
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#9
SmileSmileSmileSmileSmileSmileSmileSmile
(10-06-14, 09:59 AM)Phil link Wrote: Something under the seat of my XJR1300 got in the way of the cable release, the seat wouldn't come off. I lifted a corner and waggled a long screwdriver around only to puncture a can of emergency repair tyre weld.
I bet you sh@ yourself! it certainly made me laugh anyway.
Stop polishing it and ride the bloody thing!!
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#10
knock over bottle you're bleeding the brakes into with the one way valve and old fluid in it...  :\

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It wouldn't be fun if it was easy, I just wish it wasn't this much fun.
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#11
Spend ages trying to change the fiddly bastard headlight bulb to realise you did the wrong side because you span the bike round for more space
Its just a ride
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#12
Crack the sump tray because of foccing up righty-tighty, lefty-loosy while lying under bike! 2 days before a LeMan's trip!!!
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#13
Leave the key in the seat lock then go for a wander around the shops.........then come back and endure horror and relief at the same time.  :eek

And turn off the ignition when the needle is at 10,000rpm whilst checking the TPS..........twice.  :'(
More people are born because of alcohol than will ever die from it.
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#14
Let your 5 year old daughter sit on the bike and play with the brake lever whilst you replace the front pads.
If you worried about falling off your bike, you'd never get on.
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#15
(10-06-14, 04:19 PM)darrsi link Wrote: Leave the key in the seat lock then go for a wander around the shops.........then come back and endure horror and relief at the same time.  :eek

And turn off the ignition when the needle is at 10,000rpm whilst checking the TPS..........twice.  :'(


I went and watched a film at the cinema and came back to bike to find keys in ignition. KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU MEAN!!!  :b
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#16
(10-06-14, 06:21 PM)kawasutra link Wrote: [quote author=darrsi link=topic=13537.msg152805#msg152805 date=1402413543]
Leave the key in the seat lock then go for a wander around the shops.........then come back and endure horror and relief at the same time.  :eek

And turn off the ignition when the needle is at 10,000rpm whilst checking the TPS..........twice.  :'(


I went and watched a film at the cinema and came back to bike to find keys in ignition. KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU MEAN!!!  :b
[/quote]

Ditto! Exup did the same to my bike after parking it on the first LoFos meet.
The Deef's apprentice
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#17
Left mine in the bike while I had a good wander round Salisbury once - came back to find another biker waitng there for me, my keys in his hand - what a sterling chap!  :o

It must be essential to do this at some point, as everybody seems to do it at least once  :rolleyes
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#18
Make the excuse to your missus that you need to go to the garage for summat car related from the forecourt shop, she say" I know your going for a ride" you say "sweetheart, of course not, tanks nearly empty anyhoo" then you sneakily fill up at the garage to go for a ride, realise you've forgotten your card, and have to phone her to pay for it... :o

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#19
almost crash into the back of cars/vans/buses while looking at women too long
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#20
(10-06-14, 06:40 PM)ogri48 link Wrote: Make the excuse to your missus that you need to go to the garage for summat car related from the forecourt shop, she say" I know your going for a ride" you say "sweetheart, of course not, tanks nearly empty anyhoo" then you sneakily fill up at the garage to go for a ride, realise you've forgotten your card, and have to phone her to pay for it... :o


:rollin :rollin


DOOOOOH!!!!!
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