+- Fazer Owners Club - Unofficial (https://foc-u.co.uk/mybb)
+-- Forum: Bikes, Hints'n'Tips (https://foc-u.co.uk/mybb/forumdisplay.php?fid=66)
+--- Forum: Fazer 1000/FZ1 corner (https://foc-u.co.uk/mybb/forumdisplay.php?fid=75)
+--- Thread: Advice for anyone going to France (/showthread.php?tid=59466)
Pages:
1
2
Re: Advice for anyone going to France - pitternator - 22-07-12
Just got back from 12 days touring europe ( france, germany, slovenia, austria and italy).
not stopped once...but plenty of police prescence.Lots of talk about speed traps, saw tbh as many this year as any other.
we dont go crazy speed wise, but also dont stick rigidly to limits. As in the UK, I pick my roads to " make progress".....given the way many europeans do stick to limits...fast bikes stand out a lot. You have to think where and when to give the bike some head.
once again we found most french drivers will move over for you , thanks !
Re: Advice for anyone going to France - devilsyam - 22-07-12
reasons to hate the froggies
1. Because they're losers
Rugby matches played by England against France since 1906: 89. We've won 47; they've won 35. Draws: 7. 2. Because they're aggressive
Wars fought against France since 1066: 35. We've won 23; they've won 11. Mutual defeats: 1 (American War of Independence). 3. Because of Napoleon
200 French streets, monuments and institutions commemorate the era of Napoleon, the inventor of totalitarian dictatorship. 4. And because of the Napoleon Complex
While Napoleon was actually 5ft 6.5in tall, his aggression may have stemmed from "strikingly small, infantile and undersized genitals", as revealed in his autopsy. The organ in question measured 1.25in. 5. Because they make love more than anyone else
On average, that's 137 times a year; we only manage 119 times.
6. Because everyone believes they're great lovers
But when asked about Napoleon's love-making, French good-time girl Marguerite Josephine Weimer remarked that the Duke of Wellington was "beaucoup le plus fort". Today, just 23 per cent of French people are happy with their sex lives compared to 25 per cent of Brits.
7. Because they love yappy dogs
More than nine per cent of French dog owners have a poodle.
8. But they won't clean up after them
French dog owners refuse to pick up the 5,840 tonnes of dog-doo dropped on their streets each year.
9. Because they're allergic to customer service
In London eateries, it takes an average 3.4 minutes to get a glass of water once a waiter has been alerted; in Paris it takes 17.9 minutes.
10. Because they're rude
The "Paris Syndrome" is a medically recognised type of depression which afflicts foreign visitors, caused by the sustained rudeness of French people to outsiders.
11. Because they can't wait
Many French men still prefer the convenience of a trottoir to the public WC.
12. Because they lack humour
Before the Revolution, the French spoke of l'esprit (wit), or la farce (joke) but the word "humour" had no equivalent. Not until 1932 did the French Academy allow l'humour into the language.
13. Because we've been allowed to believe that French women don't get fat
Current diet books claim that French women are thin because they eat only fresh produce, and slowly. However, French obesity rates are exploding and one in four French women is on some kind of mood-altering medication. Of course they're not hungry – they're stoned.
14. Because they do things the wrong way
The French take more suppositories than the rest of Europe combined. In 2006, they shoved 235 tonnes of pharmaceuticals up themselves. That's equivalent to 1,850 Gérard Depardieus (approx.).
15. That goes for their wildlife, too
In 1998 alone, 25 million geese and ducks were force-fed in battery farms to make foie gras: the €20 hors d'oeuvre.
16. Because they love Jerry
In 1963, Jerry Lewis's The Nutty Professor was voted "Best Film" in France. Le Roi du Crazy, as Lewis is known over there, holds the Legion of Honour, traditionally awarded only to victorious French generals: pretty rare.
17. And they hate Gerry
In 2005, national treasure Gérard Depardieu announced he was leaving France because: "Only the British understand me… They have a great sense of humour. It is the French who are cretins".
18. Because they think their cooking is the best in the world
They boasted 26 three-starred restaurants in the 2005 Michelin Guide. However, the guide is a French institution. Could that be why the UK had only three? Coincidence, non?
19. Because of their incessant wining
Does France still make the best wine? Not if you go by the infamous Paris Wine Tasting of 1976, when an English wine merchant organised a "blind" tasting before a jury of French experts. To their horror, they rated Californian wines as winners in both the red and white wine categories. The French press first denied any tasting had happened, then claimed the results were fixed.
20. You can't trust their wine labels either
In one 2002 case, a Burgundian vintner got jailed for rebottling 4,000 hectolitres of Algerian plonk as a much more expensive Bordeaux.
21. Because they took the cow pat… and turned it into a hat
Well, that's what the beret is, isn't it?
22. Because their legendary "Va Va Voom" is a lie
They only spend an average 19.2 minutes on foreplay. The British take 22.5 minutes.
23. Because 50 per cent of them don't even associate sex with pleasure
And 23 per cent say they would be "relieved" not to have sex for several months.
24. Because they patented the kiss
In fact, there is no actual word for "French Kiss" in French. It is simply embrasser avec la langue (literally, to kiss with the tongue). Colloquially it is referred to as rouler une pelle (to roll the spade). Only in Quebec is it "frencher".
25. Because they're big bullies
The French shoot, poison, trap, crush, stuff and then eat almost anything smaller than themselves. Box-nets are laid down across the Aquitaine countryside to trap skylarks, while Languedoc hunters blast turtledoves out of the sky.
26. Because the French health service is the best in the world
However, during a 2003 heat wave, the French health services, rated as a "world best" by the WHO, failed to prevent the deaths of 16,300 elderly people.
27. Because their country doesn't work
Employers have to pay social security taxes equal to 48 per cent of each employee's salary, so they take on fewer people, and France's unemployment rate has hovered around 10 per cent for a decade.
28. Because they get up our noses
Forty per cent of French men, and 25 per cent of women, do not change their underwear daily – and only 47 per cent bathe every day (compared to 70 per cent of the British).
29. Because they invented Sadism
France is not only the birthplace of the Marquis de Sade but also of Renault's flirty series of Ben and Sophie "Eiffel Tower v Blackpool Tower" TV ads. Talk about torture…
30. Because it's taken them a thousand years to admit we're better than them
"The standard of life of the British is higher than that of the French," said M. le President Nicolas Sarkozy, in his 2006 autobiography.
enough reasons for me to bypass frog land nice roads or not
Re: Advice for anyone going to France - chaparral02 - 22-07-12
Quote:[size=1.45em]Bike ban in French cities[/size]
[size=1.45em]any bike made before 1 July 2004,[/size]
http://www.visordown.com/motorcycle-news--general-news/bike-ban-in-french-cities/17766.html
Ok guys it time to take all your gen1's to the scrap yard :lol
:lurk
Re: Advice for anyone going to France - fireblake - 22-07-12
Nice one Luke. :rollin Although i still love it there.
Re: Advice for anyone going to France - tomlinscote - 22-07-12
Not going to go down the route of going over someone else's post and counter arguing it etc esp as I agree with many of Luke's points BUT it is mainly the Parisians that are rude, they are even ruder to other French people in fact anyone not from Paris!! Don't let those arogant gits put you off, the rest of them are not that bad, really, I know!!
Also got to agree with Pitt too, if you don't openly take the piss on their roads the coppers usually leave bikers well alone and the car and truck drivers really do go out of their way to let you through even to the extent of driving on the verge!! I was stuck behind 2 lorries overtaking each other at 1 mph difference as usual, as soon as they saw me in their mirrors they parted like the Red Sea in a Cecil B Demill (?) movie and let me through the middle, felt a bit like Bond!!
Oh and Luke forgot their absolutely shite 'popular' music, their radio stations really are to be avoided at all costs! Maybe we should script write for Al Murray......................!
Re: Advice for anyone going to France - pitternator - 23-07-12
Have to admit I found the french this year to be polite and friendly. I drove across france there and back, one way all motorway , the other mostly country roads.So I saw a fair chunk of the place.
my best " parting of the red sea " moment was in 2009 as we tried to get to our hotel in caen..utter gridlock on the ringroad...our 4 bikes showed up, everyone moved aside like magic...should have videoed it !
MY big beef is the paucity of decent places to eat in France, and the dratted " le weekend" where everywhere shuts at 2pm ( except macdonalds). For a country with its gastronomic reputation, there seems bugger all cafes left. A few frites vans, but very few roadside eateries. We could do with some sort of directory !
Re: Advice for anyone going to France - yamahasan - 25-07-12
(21-07-12, 12:15 PM)tomlinscote link Wrote: No worries, but just looked at your dates again be aware that on the 15th August there is a big religeous festival and many over night places will be totally booked up so you may need to plan your route especially carefully around that week (it falls on a Wednesday) also almost all shops will be shut and some of the restaurants too (bizzarely seeing as people want to eat out that day!) but also note that many villages and towns will have events on which include food so you should not be too far from something edible (!)
havent been around for some days (mainly working and preparing the trip, we leave tomorrow). thanks again for all the advice!
Re: Advice for anyone going to France - tomlinscote - 25-07-12
Have a great trip and if you are anywhere near Maurs (the junction of the Lot the Aveyron and the Cantal) feel free to pop in. Send me a txt if you plan too
Re: Advice for anyone going to France - yamahasan - 25-07-12
cool. wish you some good rides for the rest of the summer too.
adiós!
Re: Advice for anyone going to France - manuel32 - 25-07-12
I think its avoir, or like it, :rolleyes
We did the full length of France a few weeks ago to get to Barcelona for the Moto GP
My mate pulled alongside me on most of the toll things, and then we pulled away together so we only paid for one bike each stretch.Paiage.
Saved about £50 on tolls.
No problems with plod,,even made contact with them at the services, go and ask them the way to a place,,freinds for life then,,
Re: Advice for anyone going to France - pitternator - 26-07-12
feck, never thought of doing that !..mind you there often is a camera mounted over the peage area...so am surprised no gendarmes harried after you !....not so risky if leaving motorway, but if you rejoin another stretch of peage, you would be trapped.
Re: Advice for anyone going to France - manuel32 - 26-07-12
From what we saw , all the camers are facing you when you put your ticket in,,so no numberplate recognition.
Only in Barcelona near the Moto GP were there staff running from lane to lane to make sure you went single file,
I have read that if you go to the manned kiosk that it is cheaper for bikes,,instead of taking a ticket and paying for a car.
Re: Advice for anyone going to France - tomlinscote - 26-07-12
Its always cheaper for bikes in France I think the camera is there to detect the class of vehicle maybe by going side by side it thought you were a car!! Bike price is between half and 2/3 of the car price.
The worst place is Italy where bikes have to pay the same as cars all the time, I had to pay over £25 just to go through some poxy tunnel!! Still it was November and the Alps did have snow on them.......
Maybe you meant "Au Revoir" as avoir means To have
Re: Advice for anyone going to France - yamahasan - 17-09-12
same shite in Spain: bikes pay as much as cars!!! back in my country (I live in Spain but Im form Uruguay) bikes dont pay at all......
Re: Advice for anyone going to France - Khaotik - 17-09-12
Love the country, hate the snoty inhabitants.
Re: Advice for anyone going to France - ullukk - 31-12-12
(22-07-12, 11:08 AM)chaparral02 link Wrote:Quote:[size=1.45em]Bike ban in French cities[/size]
[size=1.45em]any bike made before 1 July 2004,[/size]
http://www.visordown.com/motorcycle-news--general-news/bike-ban-in-french-cities/17766.html
Plan on a fortnight trip next year to the basque country area via spending a few days riding through France there and back, must admit didn't know about this particular law, i intend to be on my trusty "old" 53 plate fazer for the trip and avoid french motorways and cities anyway, i hopefully wont go off my intended track and face a fine for the hideous crime of riding an old nail in a big city!!.