Fazer Owners Club - Unofficial
General => General => Topic started by: Farjo on 16 September 2014, 10:26:07 pm
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Non-motorbike thread :)
I make bread and when people find out they always say:
1) Do you have a bread machine?
and then a bit later,
2) Do you make it with seed mixes?
What do people always say when you tell them something you do?
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ok so this is a common one.
I say..."I have a motorbike"
they say..."oh I couldn't have a bike I'd kill myself"
I always feel offended as if they are somehow implying that they are more hard core than I am...I think they are either trying to say that they have either no self control or that they'd have no skill on a bike, I'm not sure but it always secretly irks me. :evil
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I often get "....is that legal?". Followed by "....Dont the sheep mind?"
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I say I ride a motor bike
they say "ohh that too dangerous"
I say --- yeh THATS WHY I RIDE ------------shuts them the FOC up
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ok so this is a common one.
I say..."I have a motorbike"
they say..."oh I couldn't have a bike I'd kill myself"
I always feel offended as if they are somehow implying that they are more hard core than I am...I think they are either trying to say that they have either no self control or that they'd have no skill on a bike, I'm not sure but it always secretly irks me. :evil
Add to this:
"My Mrs would never let me have a bike" or "I'd never let my husband have a bike, just think what you're putting your wife through every time you go out."
Pisses me off too. :rolleyes
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ok so this is a common one.
I say..."I have a motorbike"
they say..."oh I couldn't have a bike I'd kill myself"
I always feel offended as if they are somehow implying that they are more hard core than I am...I think they are either trying to say that they have either no self control or that they'd have no skill on a bike, I'm not sure but it always secretly irks me. :evil
Add to this:
"My Mrs would never let me have a bike" or "I'd never let my husband have a bike, just think what you're putting your wife through every time you go out."
Pisses me off too. :rolleyes
I generally just tell them to grow a pair, and remind their mrs it's safer than horse riding!
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"I havn't got the patience for that" (angling).Every time. :rolleyes.
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In shops in my full leathers I get "Do you ride a bike"
My standard reply "God no, I dress like this for fun"
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When people ask me what I do and I say I fly helicopters, they tell me they couldn't do that, too scared, they're too dangerous and they'd only ever fly in an aeroplane.
Imagine the reaction if I also said I ride motorbikes !!
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Actually look what he said
Non-motorbike thread :)
And what have we all done !
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Actually look what he said
Non-motorbike thread :)
And what have we all done !
Deeply imbedded in all of us :lol
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Actually look what he said
Non-motorbike thread :)
And what have we all done !
Not me...angling=fishing for fishes ;).
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I couldn't be arsed with that, yamfazman, no patience...
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Actually look what he said
Non-motorbike thread :)
And what have we all done !
Not me...angling=fishing for fishes ;) .
Oh I thought it was leaning over on your bike
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Actually look what he said
Non-motorbike thread :)
And what have we all done !
:lol
I wrote that because I think there was a "What do people say when you tell them you ride a motorbike" thread not too long ago :)
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Had a tattoo inside of my lip when i was a teenager, as you do, and if ever i show anyone they always say "Did it hurt?"
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When folks find out my job, "Do you teach with them IN??" whilst pointing at my piercings.
Same with the tattoo one, "Did that hurt?".
No, someone spent 80 hours sticking small needles into my flesh several times a second, it didn't hurt at all...
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car/bike detailing.
people always say that they "wouldn't have the patience for it" or "couldn't be bothered with it" as it'll just get dirty again...
If anyone see's me washing the car/bike you always get the "you missed a bit" one... focking hate that. haha
Chris
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Every time I sneeze in front of my mum she says " I beg your pardon"
so I say " you are pardoned mother" to which she always makes a face and calls me a smart arse and then I again have to explain that she has said it back to front.....again!
she'll never learn though :wall
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Was bitten by a stray dog while away on holidays. Back in work, I got a lot of stick (no pun intended), and a week later someone asks "any doggy superpowers yet?".
No, but I can smell bullsh1t from a mile away now.
It doesn't sound very nice now.. oh well..
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I live in Cornwall & work near Basingstoke (with digs in Portsmouth... long story...)
when people find out I live in Cornwall they ask how long that takes to travel & when I tell them 4 hours they then ask if I do it every day?
when I say I got digs in Portsmouth they say.. thats a long journey!!! lol (its only 35 miles!)
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I spent my working life in the Merchant Navy.
When I got home on leave friends would always say
When did you get back, it was usually the first question.
When do you go back, was always their second one
Where did you get to
Saudi Arabia, , there was always someones wife/girlfriend would say how lovely. :rolleyes
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When people ask what I do for a living, I say, "I'm a pattern-maker", to which they always reply, "What, dresses and suits and that sort of thing?"
I've had someone once say, "You must be good at knitting then..."
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i remember as a kid been asked what i wanted to be and my reply was ...
a saggers maker bottom knocker!!
didn't get many replies to that!! :lol :lol
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I couldn't be arsed with that, yamfazman, no patience...
:lol.good 1!
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when asked what I do
I reply "I dig holes".
subject moves on, nobody seems interested in holes :\
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Not even a "Well , well, well?" :(
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By all that's holy, frazer, is that the best you could do? :rollin
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Yes :D And I don't see you coming up with anything better :smash
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Cycle. Do you wear a helmet?
Who gives a shit whether I do or don't. Really?
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When I was in the Army and home on leave and I saw friends/family, one of the first things they say is "when are you going back?" Charming!
Standing there in my leathers, wearing my helmet whilst paying for petrol, and the only bike on the courtyard. cashier looks across at the pumps and asks "which one is yours?"
And these people are allowed to be out on their own......;D
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Cycle. Do you wear a helmet?
Who gives a shit whether I do or don't. Really?
Apparently some people shout out of cars "Where's your helmet?" At cyclists. Have you ever had that?
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When I say ' Gamekeeper ' I get, cruel bastid, murderer etc. If I give it another angle and say Wildlife management I get , interesting, great job etc. One day people will see we don't walk about all day with a shotgun and dog at our side.
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When I give em the bill
HOW MUCH ?
:lol
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When I go for a curry and ask for a chicken Phall :lol
"Oh Sir dat is velly velly hot curry Sir"
Er Yes... That's why I ordered it.
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'Will you shut the feck up about independence' seems fairly common these days
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in the west of Scotland shop assistants always say "Is that you" there way of asking if you have finished ordering or such.----Crazy
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When i tell people I am a technical manager for an electronics retailer
Oh you into computers and gadgets then.....No Im into motorbikes
Oh I thought you would have to be.....No I know a lot about them but I,m into motorbikes :lol
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when asked what I do
I reply "I dig holes".
subject moves on, nobody seems interested in holes :\
What sort of depth are we talking about?
I met a Channel Tunnel worker years ago.......
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I met a mate of mine one day and he asked if I was still working nightshift and when I said yes his Mrs` said "Oh that must be good as you have all day to do what you want" to which my mate replied "You stupid foccin woman, when do you think he sleeps" She still didn`t get it.
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Whenever you mislay your car/bike keys the 1st question is usually..'where did you last have them/see them?'..well if I knew that..... :rolleyes
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When I was a kid rellies would always say "my, haven't you grown?!" Er, yeah, that's what we do you know. Trouble is, they still say it now I'm 45, just outward not upward LOL fat foccer (ish).
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When I tell people I'm an Aerospace engineer:
"Wow, you must be really intelligent" / "Isn't that really hard?" (The answer: "no I / it ain't. But I'm still crap at it." worries 'em ;) )
Followed shortly by:
"Can you please fix this?" Generally pointing at something bloody simple that requires 2 minutes with a screwdriver. Or a car. :rolleyes :rolleyes :rolleyes
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My dad is a clever foccer with a PhD in electronics or something. Whenever he gets introduced to people at parties as Dr they always start telling him about their aches and pains.