Author Topic: Real men (Read 6783 times)

Just Anne · « **on:** 24 October 2011, 07:10:19 pm »

Just caught the end of an interview with James May on radio 2 talking about 'real men' and manliness. Got me thinking, what is a 'real man' and have our views changed on this over the past few decades? Discuss...

I'll start you off with a few atributes I would include if I were to describe a 'real man':-

knows how things work, (engines, lighting circuits, boilers)
owns and knows how to use tools and fix stuff (even if he prefers to pay someone else to do it)
would protect/defend anyone if he felt they needed help
does NOT think that holding a door open/giving up a chair/offering to help undo a jar or change a wheel for a woman is sexist

I think I have changed my views on this over the years and have come to the conclusion that expecting men to do the above as well as cook, clean, be in touch with their feminine side is probably unreasonable. Not saying they can't do this, just that expecting it may be unfair. Just my view.

Anne

John Silva · « **Reply #1 on:** 24 October 2011, 07:51:45 pm »

Real men ride carbed fazers

Captain Haddock · « **Reply #2 on:** 24 October 2011, 07:59:29 pm »

Like what he said!
Oh yes and almost bald (without the balls to ditch the last remenents of a pony tail), getting a bit fat, the wrong side of 40, with buggered knees, and farts and belches when drunk (and sober for that matter),thats a real man!
But then I am biased...

I must work on my chat up lines...

Fazerider · « **Reply #3 on:** 24 October 2011, 09:44:50 pm »

I pretty much agree with your list Anne... though point 3 might require more bravery than I possess. But then started wondering what is the corollary of this? That femininity should require women to be helpless whenever they are confronted by anything a bit technical?
Personally, I find women who are happy to check valve clearances or rewire a house quite admirable... being competent at dealing with as much as possible of life's tasks is something I aspire to and appreciate in members of the opposite sex too.
I think Mr May is probably less trying to reinforce gender stereotypes than railing against uselessness.

James

Just Anne · « **Reply #4 on:** 24 October 2011, 11:11:23 pm »

This is interesting; I'm not sure these things should be exclusive, I'm not suggesting that men can do these things and women can't or that if women do they aren't feminine. Afterall, I can check valve clearances and a few foccers can testify to the fact I felt, battoned and tiled a roof too but is that really ok?

I have observed that whereas these abilities may well be considered admirable they can also make a chap a little uncomfortable. Conversly, the inability or unwillingness in a man to do these things can make a girl a little uneasy too. I think sometimes it would be great if I lived with an excellent cook but in reality, if I did, I think I'd feel usurped. I'm also not sure a man would be comfortable if their wife never needed their help.

Anne

Fazerider · « **Reply #5 on:** 25 October 2011, 12:05:01 am »

Well, I guess that there are always going to be differences between partners that means one will be better at, or simply enjoy, some tasks more than others and a fair division of labour can be arranged... but isn't the need to feel irreplaceable as the wire-upper of plugs or pickle jar-opener just insecurity? I'd like to think a good relationship could eliminate that rather than depend upon it.

James

Dave G · « **Reply #6 on:** 25 October 2011, 12:23:29 am »

1,2 and 3 no problem. Number 4 depends if she's hot.

Fucked if I'd change a wheel for a fatty!

Raymy · « **Reply #7 on:** 25 October 2011, 01:02:37 am »

Anne, if you felt my batten, i'll whisk yer white sauce

Raymy · « **Reply #8 on:** 25 October 2011, 01:05:37 am »

Holy shit

Sounds like a threat

Captain Haddock · « **Reply #9 on:** 25 October 2011, 07:45:47 am »

Quote from: Dave G on 25 October 2011, 12:23:29 am

Fucked if I'd change a wheel for a fatty!

Thats not very PC is it, you're supposed to say "I'd like to help but you look like you need the exercise"

On a more serious note I've worked with lots of blokes that will do every bit of overtime offered purely on the grounds of 'or she'll earn more than I do' which I always thought was pretty dumb when a bit of pride swallowed means you can work shorter hours and spend more time together (in the pub spending her wages) and enjoy life more.
I like a woman that can (or even can't but will try) to fix things rather than just whinging to a bloke about it, good on you Anne for checking your tappets, when you're done can you check mine for me as I'm lazy as well as fat/bald/old/drunk.

BIG MAC · « **Reply #10 on:** 25 October 2011, 02:26:37 pm »

No mention of man flu which has to be one of the best ways of detecting manliness.
No mention of not having a boyfriend which may be another way of telling...but not always! (PC)
Does the size of his brood indicate one's manliness?
What about the judicious application of brute force and ignorance?
Refusal to ask for directions (yet most men who wont listen to their wives seem to have a female voice on their sat nav)
Anne probably has it about right...I would go about beating my hairy manly chest if it wasn't for this hangnail.......

Robbie8666 · « **Reply #11 on:** 25 October 2011, 03:50:49 pm »

oh dear i'm not sure if I am a real man

knows how things work, (engines, lighting circuits, boilers) - I know the principles if not the details!!
owns and knows how to use tools and fix stuff (even if he prefers to pay someone else to do it) -I used to own the tools until I got divorced! couldn't always fix stuff without 3 attempts then bodged it then had to pay someone to fix it
would protect/defend anyone if he felt they needed help - does going to Afghanistan count?
does NOT think that holding a door open/giving up a chair/offering to help undo a jar or change a wheel for a woman is sexist - still do this & stand when my lady leaves or returns to the table in a restaurant!

as for the getting in touch with my femenine side does enjoying cooking (or washing up when she cooks the meal) or always take flowers to my lady when i see her make me any less a man?

Robbie over 40 own hair but maybe bit more round than i was 10 years ago!

bigralphie · « **Reply #12 on:** 25 October 2011, 03:56:18 pm »

yea I agree with the list,I think also real men will hug/kiss their children and even say the L word as lots of men still cant

BIG MAC · « **Reply #13 on:** 25 October 2011, 11:42:41 pm »

Leprechaun is a hell of a word though Ralphie

Looney tune · « **Reply #14 on:** 26 October 2011, 07:29:19 am »

I thought us men were here only because a vibrator can't get a round of drinks in !!

When Beth moved in with me the only thing she wanted me to do was wash the dishes. Nice wee run to comet, dishwasher purchaced, job done.
I don't mind doing anything about the house except ironing, hate it with a passion. '' can you cook the dinner tonight please Russ '', to me that is code for ' book a table at the local '.

oldmotherfoccer · « **Reply #15 on:** 26 October 2011, 10:04:17 am »

As they say - behind every great man is a woman pushing him like f*ck and clearing the mess up behind him

locksmith · « **Reply #16 on:** 26 October 2011, 12:00:37 pm »

Never a truer word said OMF

BBROWN1664 · « **Reply #17 on:** 26 October 2011, 04:11:30 pm »

Locksmith, you obviously left your PC logged in and your wife has posted something on your behalf

knoxy · « **Reply #18 on:** 26 October 2011, 10:54:55 pm »

I'm a real man cos I have a cock the size of an Anaconda

)

Captain Haddock · « **Reply #19 on:** 27 October 2011, 07:42:17 am »

Quote from: knoxy on 26 October 2011, 10:54:55 pm

I'm a real man cos I have a cock the size of an Anaconda

Thats an unusual shape for a chicken, does it make much noise in the morning when the sun rises?

martynR · « **Reply #20 on:** 27 October 2011, 03:47:41 pm »

Quote from: Captain Haddock on 27 October 2011, 07:42:17 am

Quote from: knoxy on 26 October 2011, 10:54:55 pm
I'm a real man cos I have a cock the size of an Anaconda
Thats an unusual shape for a chicken, does it make much noise in the morning when the sun rises?

ROFL

locksmith · « **Reply #21 on:** 27 October 2011, 06:05:45 pm »

Just how big is an anaconda's cock then?

BIG MAC · « **Reply #22 on:** 27 October 2011, 09:54:35 pm »

presumably with all that crawling around it would be well worn

GringoRojo · « **Reply #23 on:** 28 October 2011, 01:14:30 am »

amazing what you find on the interweb... tried to find factual info about snake reproductive organs and found these lyrics...

Yummy bitch on her knees
"Gimme love" is all she screams
Back down low, knees up high
I'm gonna make her cry cry cry
My Anaconda Cock, Anaconda Cock
She loves it, oooh, oooh
My Anaconda Cock, Anaconda Cock
And her name's Anna...

Tmation · « **Reply #24 on:** 28 October 2011, 08:14:09 am »

WOMEN -

[/size]

Two female friends are catching up:

- So, how was your evening last night?

- A disaster! After getting home, my dear beloved hubby wolfed down in 4

minutes the dinner that took me all afternoon to prepare, "granted" me 3 minutes of passionate love before rolling over and falling asleep 2 minutes later.

[font='lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif]And you?
[font='lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif]- Oh, mine was incredible. My hubby was waiting for me to get back home from work.. He took me out for a very romantic dinner. We then walked back home, under an amazing starry sky, along the canal, for a good two hours. Once home, he lit up all the candles we had and our foreplay lasted for an hour. We then made love for another hour and then we chatted until late. It was wonderfull...[/font]

[font='lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif]MEN - [/font]
[font='lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif]Meanwhile, at the pub, the husbands are "networking"...:[/font]
[font='lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif]- So, how was your evening last night?[/font]
[font='lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif]- Great! When I came home, the food was ready. I ate, we shagged and I fell asleep. You?[/font]
[font='lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif]- A nightmare! I came home earlier to fix the kitchen shelf. When I[/font]
[font='lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif]switched on the power drill, the fuse went out. The whole house went into darkness.[/font]
[font='lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif]Couldn't find the bloody fusebox, so when my better half arrived, I took her out.[/font]
[font='lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif]It was the only thing to do to avoid getting an earfull... Dinner was so expensive that I couldn't afford the taxi back home, so we had to walk home. Once there, the house was still in the dark, obviously, so I had to light all these f * cking candles to avoid knocking everything down. I was so wound up that it took me an hour to get a hard on, and another one to come. In the end, I was so p!ssed off that it took me ages to fall asleep, while she kept yapping on and on about everything and nothing...[/font][/size][/font]